Friday, January 23, 2004
It appears hunting is all the rage among the higher ranks of the Imperium.
On January 1, 2004, President Bush and 41, as indicated in this January 1st Reuters report, slaughtered a few quail on a private ranch in the southern Texas town of Falfurrias.
43, later bemoaning his hunting skills to reporters, claimed to have bagged 5 quail out of a Texas limit of 15.
Scalia and Cheney PhotoShop'ed at Golden Ranch Plantation
At some point, also during the first week of this month but not specifically datelined, limited news accounts mentioned that Imperial Regent Cheney and Antonin Scalia, an Associate Justice of the very court scheduled to hear an upcoming Vice Presidential appeal, spent time duck hunting at a private camp in south Louisiana.
While this morning’s Los Angeles Times reports that the ranking Democratic members of the Judiciary and Governmental Affairs Committees are wanting Chief Justice and tiny dog fancier William H. Rehnquist to examine issues of apparent conflict, my thoughts wandered in other directions.
On January 2nd I made a fleeting mention of the President’s more rugged casual clothes as he, fresh from the quail killing fields, talked in an unusually relaxed manner with the traveling pool.
Though he was disparaging his rifle prowess, I remember noticing the President’s 5 claimed kills had our usually dour leader rather giddy.
Shortly thereafter I watched a CBS News report on robotic hunting decoys.
In the report, the manufacturer guaranteed at least 5 kills per hunter using his devices.
Hummm, where had I heard that that number mixed with the idea of hunting?
Ah, yes, I remember!
I had reports, not from British Intelligence, of the President acquiring similar quantities of quail out of Texas!
The sporting goods Website Dowdlesports.com displays an amazing collection of expensive robotic waterfowl and even robotic flocks meant to lure unsuspecting and highly susceptible early and late season migratories to an efficient and entertaining doom.
An individual RoboDuk retails for $129.95 but I suspect our infamous Vice Imperator would prefer one of the two decoy sets Dowdlesports.com refers to as:
The most effective decoy system[s] in the world!
The Mallard Machine
For $184.95 to $194.50, the guarantee of success and a $27.50 battery and AC charger, a hunter could utilize a 3 or 4 unit swimming decoy system with the doomsday moniker, Mallard Machine
This decoy system allows the unsportsmanlike hunter to choose many motions from swimming to diving, shaking, sitting still or thrashing water.
Increasingly heavy hitters are offered what seems to be the ultimate weapon of duck destruction with the $279.95 swimming duck decoy system the Quaker Smacker.
Have our leaders dabbled in robo-duckery?
I was also curious about available bayou lodgings suitable for major Personages.
While surfing, and for your information, I discovered that after enjoying the fruits of daily hunts with a la cart pricing, some high rolling corporate and other important huntsmen in southern Louisiana are likely to rest and dine, as their game is processed for another fee, at the two day minimum $2,200 per day 50,000 acre Golden Ranch Plantation.
Photos: Reuters, Golden Ranch Plantation, DowdleSports.com