Art Pottery, Politics and Food
Tuesday, August 30, 2005
Zoom, Zoom, Zoom!

Mrs. Ernie Fletcher, showing a little untanned boob, escorts another into the Grand Jury room

Kentucky Governor Ernie Fletcher, today, appeared before the Special Grand Jury examining corrupt state hiring practices for exactly 2 minutes and 18 seconds, according to one Associated Press report:

Fletcher said he gave his name, address and occupation to the grand jury.

A report combining AP material with local reporting published in a free northern Kentucky weekly owned by heavily Republican local developers has Fletcher hotfooting it out of the grand jury room and into Franklin Circuit Judge William Graham’s chambers “to explain why he had invoked his Fifth Amendment right against self-incrimination” in what must have been an action-packed 2 minute and 18 second grand jury appearance that seemingly included a pesky sworn oath.
In a lengthy press conference at the state Capitol building following Fast Ernie’s grand jury zoom, zoom, zoom, the newly loquacious Fletcher seemed to follow the national Republican lead by blaming the opposition’s “corrupt political machine” as well as his own “overeager young managers” for certain executive failings now reinforced by yesterday’s questionable pardons.
Oddly, our morally double-jointed Governor confessed to the assembled press that he was not able to "anticipate or conceive of a situation" where he would self-pardon.
“I would like this to be a new day”, said Fast Ernie.
According to quotes found in AP and Cincinnati Post reports, that new day's dawn might be indefinately delayed.
Joe Gershtenson, director of the Center for Kentucky History and Politics at Eastern Kentucky University said, "Pardons are risky...They inevitably create at least some perception that there's some guilt."
According to state Rep. Dennis Keene, D-Wilder, KY, yesterday was "a dark day for the state" and "the governor's finally admitted guilt...Not only has he committed political suicide, but he's also damaged a lot of Republican careers in the House and in the Senate.
They'll all go down the tubes with him."
Regarding deputy Chief of Staff Dick Murgatroyd, Rep. Keene also said, "This is it for Dick Murgatroyd."

Photo: AP
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